Showbiz 10: ‘It’s literally like a ferret has gone up there and died’

Wednesday showbiz newswrap for October 28th with a look at ten entertainment stories making this news. Vivian is very pleased with herself this week, she’s used some awfully fancy words.

ALL WIND

I think we may have found the lowest our darling of the tabloids Katie Price will go to get into the papers. This week, fresh from her teeth falling apart, her broken ankles and hair falling out she now has told social media followers she’s got a flatulence problem.

Price discussed with her followers a trip she’d taken to a doctor to investigate why she can’t stop letting rip.

“People think farts are funny. But mine are beyond funny now… It’s literally like a ferret has gone up there and died.”

With all her problems she sounds like she should look like Albert Steptoe.

BABY JOY

Congrats are in order for actress Susie Amy who, with boyfriend Raphael Bar, have welcomed baby girl Rosie Iris Grace, she is the younger sister to their first child Noa.

Tom Parker and his wife Kelsey have welcomed their second child while Camilla Thurlow and Jamie Jewitt celebrated the birth of their first, a baby girl.

FLOOD GATES

Gareth Gates this week spoke about how he lost £250,000 after falling victim to a ‘bad trader’ on the currency markets.

Speaking to The Times the singer explained how he met up with an expert who claimed to be au fait in trading foreign currency. While the first year proved to be lurcative the second twelve months saw his investment go tits up and profit turned to a major loss – to the tune of a quarter of a million pounds.

“I got nothing back and it was a big learning curve for me.”

JACK OFF

Jack P. Shepherd’s ex-fiancée was tampin’ fumin’ ragin’ this week after he appeared for a nice fee in OK! magazine boasting of his perfect life with a ‘blended family’.

Talking a hit back in a tabloid newspaper Lauren Shippey savaged the Coronation Street actor for his gushing chat with the posh magazine.

Speaking for the first time, Lauren, mum to their two kids, spoke to The Sun on how the feature made ‘her laugh’ but not for the right reasons.

“It made me laugh. We’re about as blended as a breeze block in a cement mixer… I’m speaking out now because Jack has used his celebrity status to give an interview which portrays a false image of how he behaves.”

Lauren split from Jack three years ago, and noted at one point he didn’t, she says, see his children for four months.

GREASY SNOWFLAKES

Olivia Newton-John hit back at claims – by the easily offended who have nothing better to do – that Grease was sexist. The movie, set in the 1950s, shows Olivia’s character of Sandy undergoing a raunchy makeover to win Danny, played by John Travolta, over.

Talking to The Guardian, the actress, told those moaning that there was ‘nothing deep to her character’ and was just ‘a girl who was in love with a guy.’ The film, produced in 1978, followed the stories of several teens in their final year at high school, with the central focus on Danny and Sandy.

LOCK OFF

Chelsee Healey, of Hollyoaks fame, has apologised for breaking lockdown rules amid the ongoing 2020 pandemic. Healey, who features as Goldie McQueen on the Channel 4 soap, was snapped having a darn good time at an illegal rave in Manchester in June, breaching local restrictions.

The actress said her night of fun was ‘a silly mistake’ and she would be sticking to the rules henceforth

RIP

It was farewell to actor and comedian Johnny Leeze who died aged 78. Or in ITV3’s bungled ‘tribute’ the actor Ned Glover passed away.

They, of course, muddled his character name from Emmerdale with his. The Yorkshire Television soap is possibly the role he’s best remembered for appearing as Ned from 1994 to 2000. Johnny passed away from a heart attack after recently testing positive for COVID-19. He also suffered from underlying health conditions.

It was also goodbye to BBC personality Frank Bough, who died at the age of 87. Frank began his BBC television career in Newcastle on the programme that eventually became Look North. He is however best remembered as the face of Breakfast Time as well as Grandstand, Match of the Day, Sportsview and Nationwide. In later years he worked for LWT regional news and LBC Radio.

“Frank excelled as a live presenter with the BBC for many years and we are very sorry to hear of his passing. We send our condolences to his family and friends.” – BBC Statement on Frank Bough

This week also saw the death of Grampian Television stalward John Duncanson who passed away aged 80. The newsreader was best known as host of North Tonight, the news programme for Northern Scotland during Grampian’s time on air.

John joined Grampian Television in 1979, now STV North, and fronted the regional news show for eighteen years working alongside co-hosts including Selina Scott, Anna Soubry and Anne MacKenzie. Prior to this, he had worked for Border Television, Ulster TV, Tyne-Tees, Anglia, HTV and ABC Manchester over a career in broadcasting that began in 1964.

Stateside William Blinn screenwriter on television dramas including Brian’s Song, Roots and the Prince film Purple Rain died at 83.

STRICTLY NUTTERS

Strictly Come Dancing professional dancer Dianne Buswell has been reportedly targetted by crazed Joe Suggs fans following being partnered up with Max George on this year’s ballroom battle.

It seems scared of the ‘Strictly curse’ – in which people who are partnered end up in a lust session – some of Joe’s deluded fans have taken to, allegedly, sending Buswell disturbing social media messages.

Joe and Dianne were partnered on the 2018 series, and since went on to become a romantic couple off-screen.

NO SPILT

Phillip Schofield has said in a podcast chat that he hasn’t even considered getting a divorce, despite the fact he is gay and married to a woman.

His wife of 27-years Stephanie Lowe,  has stood by the This Morning host following his falling out the closet on the progamme in February this year.

Philip is taking about his year of turmoil as he’s currently plugging his autobiography. The cash from that hopefully will ease his painful memories. Although if I was his wife shoving a hardback up his arse may be the only way I’d feel better.

BAD JUDGEMENT

On the X Factor the only bad judgement usually came from Irish leg-end Louis Walsh, but for shamed X Factor contestant Danny Tetley it seems he’s been in luck getting put in front of Lady Justice Simler of the High Court.

She has amazingly cut his 17-year sentence for sexually exploiting seven teenagers. That’s right sexually exploting SEVEN teenagers and she thinks seventeen years is ‘too lengthy’.

The pervert will now be dealing with 14-years. Lets hope that the “highly predatory and manipulative individual” learns in that time then.

Tetley, 39, plead guilty to inducing boys between the ages of 14 and 16 to send him indecent images in exchange for money. Two further charges related to the distribution of indecent images.

This opinion piece is written by Vivian Summers, her views are hers alone and are not endorsed by ATV Today or ATV News.